I have noticed some ugly trends in my personality lately... pressure makes me snap, it never used to; and then it used to give me stomach pains but I would never get angry or explode. But now I do, like a pot with too much water as it boils over. Flickers of rage directed at loved ones lasting less than a minute. But what if that changes? What if they start lasting longer? What if the rage never leaves me?

Just when we think that we are under control, something like this happens and shakes us about! I first noticed a couple of weeks ago; I have always been not-the-most-patient kid on the block but lately I lose my patience and snap at people and then I feel like one of those alcoholics that beat up his wife in a drunken stupor. I think the feeling of regret after is the worst combined with the feeling of helplessnes. At first I could not articulate what the problem was, and then suddenly last Tuesday as I was waiting for my son to finish swim lesson I realised it... there is an issue there. Something very serious needs to be addressed and the ugly monster to turn back into its box.. And it will...