Tuesday 23 June 2009

it has come to this...


Over the years I have been known to "suffer" from a host of pathologies, ranging from the mundane to the ultra-exotic... Being a biotechnologist by virtue of my academic inclination did not help in my desire to answer the question "i wonder what's wrong with me?" .

Ok so maybe hypochondria is too strong a word to use but it is likely that the shoe fits in this case! I can take on stress like no other and transform it into a form of physical manifestation that actually causes ailment! This is something that I have come to terms with it but to see it in the people around me fills me with more than sorrow. I have had certain beacons in my adult life; certain people that I turn to and whose happiness I cherish; but above that, I cherish their outlook on life, so when they describe to me mystery symptoms that can be attributed to anxiety it is earth-shattering. When the hell will it stop? This modern attitude to worry and anticipation? Not sure if it is global warming or the financial crisis or something else entirely but it seems that we are slowly placing ourselves in a position of constant worry, almost always circling around the fact that we might lose our status quo. Possessions, life style and general standard of living.

And that is the trap of possession... the price we all pay is anxiety and stress. And even though I hate it is perfectly understandable. I will be more than anxious if we cannot make rent next week; and I will be seriously stressed if we cannot pay utility bills. So why do we choose to place ourselves in this position? Because somewhere along the way we convinced ourselves that aaaall this we now call our lives is better than a small house in the country or on an island with minimal requirements. For years I have been longing to leave the 'metropolis' behind and move the family away but we never quite make it and we are not likely to... so the price tag remains... for now..

2 comments:

  1. it should take more than a little bit of anxiety to change one's outlook on life and i hope thats true...but yesterday i was asking the question, why cant we go to an island somewhere and open a restaurant/bar and just enjoy a simple life and i think i am ready for that....and then the discussion of where and greece came up!!! of course!! but then the problem of having to close for the winter!! oh well...must find another island somewhere that has good weather all year round or get the best of both worlds..alas, the little nitty gritty of utility bills will always be there.......unless you have ridiculous amounts of money and a trustworthy accountant can deal with all that....my wish for my next birhtday...

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  2. i forgot YC, your sentiments in this particular entry are very touching..

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About Me

There is not much to say that is not covered in my posts... this blog was created because, well because writing has been a passion of mine and communicating is high up there on the list too...